


My Pearl

by dreamingmabel



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Gen, One Shot, Possibly Unrequited Love, Pre-Canon, light fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-04
Updated: 2015-04-04
Packaged: 2018-03-21 05:04:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3678672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamingmabel/pseuds/dreamingmabel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Although Rose Quartz found beauty in everything, Pearl still couldn't understand why she loved humans or the earth. At times, she couldn't even understand why the other gem even loved her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Pearl

It’s more than a little scary to them all, but seeing Rose Quartz’s eyes light up like they do, or the way her large lips pull into the most genuine smile that could ever exist, or hearing the soft laughter bubble up from her throat all make the idea of never returning home a lot easier to stomach for Pearl. Because home wasn’t somewhere among the stars, nor was it this planet that Pearl couldn’t see any sort of hope in if she tried; it was right beside Rose.  
They spent a lot of time alone together. It wasn’t that Pearl didn’t like the rest of the gems, Ruby and Sapphire were both lovely, but they preferred it when it was just the two of them, and the rest of the gems weren’t as close to Rose, and especially not as close to Pearl, who obviously held Rose in very high regards, and constantly seemed loss if she wasn’t around the large and beautiful gem.  
They would often sit together, staring up at the sky, at what they both used to call home, and Pearl would wonder how she was so privileged to be able to sit beside her, how others likely would’ve killed to be so close to someone so lovely. Pearl would’ve slaughtered an entire army if that was needed, just to hear Rose say her name a single time, even in the quickest and quietest whisper possible.  
Rose would often look to Pearl and smile at her, a smile that Pearl liked to think was all her own. “Isn’t earth grand?” she said, with a voice that could never be perfectly replicated, and she swore could make an angel cry. Her face was so earnest as she asked, looking at Pearl as though she should agree, yet in a way that also made her unable to lie.  
“Is it..?” Pearl replied, voice twisting slightly, and if Rose’s voice a flowing glass of wine, then Pearl’s was full of lemons, her tone slightly sour. She quickly looked back up at Rose, appearing horrified with her choice of words, although the pink gem just let out a chuckle that sounded somewhat saddened.  
“You disagree,” she stated, brushing a strand of pink hair away from her face, not seeming as offended with Pearl’s disagreement as she had thought she would be. Pearl relaxed, but only slightly, looking back down and pulling at the grass, ripping it out of the earth, before stopping, wondering if that made this place, the one that Rose loved so dearly, a little less beautiful. If that was so, it would be better to stop pulling at her hair when she was panicking, so she could remain aesthetically pleasing enough for Rose, so she could be beautiful and worthy of her love, just like this planet.  
“Well… yes,” she said, with a bit of hesitation, pulling her legs up to her chest, glancing back downwards sheepishly, face turning a light shade of blue, almost like how the sky looked when the sun was up. “The people here live meaningless and short lives, while slowly destroying their own planet, and causing needless fights with each other. I don’t understand your love for it.”  
“Do you think the war we’re causing is meaningless?” Rose Quartz asked, and suddenly Pearl felt ashamed, like a child who had spoken out of term in the presence of their parents, or some other sort of authority figure.  
“No,” she said quietly, blue eyes flickering upwards to regard Rose once again, a shy smile pulling at the corners of her mouth. “I trust your judgement, completely.”  
Rose watched her, appearing as though a sudden thought had just struck her. “Are you fighting for me, my Pearl?” she asked, reaching her hand out, stroking the gem’s peach colored hair, that smile, Pearl’s special smile, suddenly on her face. Pearl’s full attention was on her now, head leaned slightly into her touch.  
“Of course I am,” she said, her voice soft, taken away by Rose and almost completely lost in the gentle winds blowing around them. “I’ll always think of you as the best thing that’s ever happened to that planet.”  
“It’s too early to say that,” Rose responded, her hand lingering for a moment longer, before dropping back to her side, fingers brushing against Pearl’s own. “There’s so much that hasn’t happened to this planet yet. We have to continue protecting it, so you can find something even better than simply me to love about this place.”  
“What could possibly be better than you?” Pearl asked, seeming mystified by the idea of anything trumping over the majesty that was Rose Quartz.  
Rose didn’t reply, not right away. She stood up, still looking at Pearl with that smile, hands clasped on top of her stomach fat, right over the gem that sat there. Pearl stared up at her, hanging onto the gem’s every word, eyes wide and eager.  
“Perhaps… yourself?” Rose suggested, holding out a hand to the other. Pearl took it, allowing Rose to pull her up, still staring at her with obvious shock in her eyes. “Believe it or not, my Pearl,” she teased lightly, “you’re pretty wonderful yourself.”  
Pearl dropped her hand quickly, face turning the brightest blue it ever had, as Rose Quartz just laughed and walked past her, starting to head back towards the temple the gems were currently living in, although she paused, not looking back to Pearl as she spoke again.  
“Maybe not yourself… I understand if you can’t see why I hold you so dearly,” Rose Quartz said, gracefully as ever. “Still, I’d like you to promise me… I want you to find something else. Something besides me that will make you believe in this planet, love it, and fight for it like you would for me. Is that too much to ask for, my Pearl?”  
Pearl shook her head, despite knowing the other gem wouldn’t be able to see her do so. “Of course it isn’t,” she replied, clasping her hands behind her back. “I’ll do my best.”  
Both went quiet, Rose Quartz just nodding a bit, more to herself than to Pearl, and walking away, while Pearl sat back down, thinking to herself.  
“Something else…” she murmured silently, hugging her knees to her chest as she glanced upwards towards the now completely darkened sky, smiling a bit as she saw the stars twinkle and break through the shadows of the night.  
Herself? Nah, she was just another Pearl, and a defective one at that. Besides, all her thoughts were either of Rose Quartz or hateful and disgusting things that should never see the light of day. What was there to love about that? This planet? She didn’t think she’d ever see the beauty inside of it, not like Rose Quartz did. What was there then..?  
It wasn’t until many years later, when Ruby and Sapphire simply became Garnet and Amethyst joined them that she discovered something else worth protecting. It was until Rose Quartz had met Greg and fallen in love with him, it wasn’t until Pearl went from being her number one to her number two that she discovered it.  
It wasn’t until Rose Quartz died that she realized there was a life outside of her and that she had thoughts away from her, no matter how dark they may be.  
She loved others, maybe not how she loved Rose Quartz, but she felt that way about them just the same. She liked how strong Garnet was, loved holding onto her arm and knowing that she could ensure things turned out as they were supposed to, no matter the situation. She liked how Amethyst seemed not to care about anything, and liked having someone who seemed to have some sort of understanding about her basic mindset at times.  
Pearl also loved Steven, although that took a little longer to happen.  
Amethyst was the one who took to him the most quickly, laughing loudly as she stared into his crib, poking her finger down at him, although it would always end up wandering back to his gem, and her laugh would be a little more somber that time. She loved him, fully and unconditionally, and Pearl found herself liking Amethyst less and less each day, wondering how she could forgive the creature that made Rose Quartz give herself up so easily.  
Garnet followed after, although Pearl wasn’t quite sure she had ever truly hated Steven. She seemed slightly scared around him, as though the possibilities of things that could hurt this specific child made her nervous, but once things had gotten less hectic, she would calmly sit on the couch and hold him, quietly humming lullabies that they had all heard Greg singing to Steven at one point or another. Steven would laugh a lot, and Pearl never saw Garnet not smile at that.  
Pearl wasn’t sure when exactly she got used to Steven, but it definitely happened much later than it did for any of the other gems. Before she did, it was always some sort of intricate dance with Garnet and Amethyst, thinking up reasons on why she couldn’t be near him.  
“P, come on, you gotta see this cool thing with St-” “Maybe later, Amethyst.”  
“Pearl, I truly think you should at least make an effort with him.” “I am! I swear, I am!”  
“Hey Pearl, I never see you playing with Steven.” “I guess you just aren’t around when it happens, Greg.”  
Of course, she couldn’t avoid Steven forever, and she faced that reality late one night, when Garnet was on a mission and Amethyst was fast asleep. She could hear loud crying coming from the crib currently set in the living room, and once the noise became too much, she made her way over, blankly staring at the fleshy child. Upon noticing her, he stopped, smiling a smile so similar to Rose’s it hurt. His arms flailed upwards, as though indicating he wanted up. Pearl obliged, staring at him closely.  
“Rose Quartz..?” she murmured silently, tilting her head curiously. Steven tilted his head right back at her, before smiling and letting out a soft laugh.  
“Pearl!” he said, along with a bunch of baby gibberish afterwards. “My Pearl!”  
She adjusted her hold on the child, holding him closer to her, bowing her head, eyes watery. “Oh, Steven,” she murmured quietly, planting a kiss on his forehead. She stood with him, until the baby had fallen asleep again, and then put him back into the crib, slowly as to not disturb him. She stood there, watching him sleep for a moment, before lifting her head upwards, as though staring up at the sky and not just the ceiling, before turning to look towards the painting of Rose instead.  
“Rose,” she said, offering a small smile, as though the painting could take it from her. “I was wrong. Steven is… maybe humans in general are better than I thought. Plus, I think I found something worth protecting this planet for… something other than you.”  
She thought she understood a bit better now why Rose thought the world was such a great place. She couldn’t find a single bad thing in Steven- maybe some of the events he had helped cause, but not Steven himself. That child was perfect, it seemed, although that wasn’t surprising; he was Rose’s, afterall.  
(Pearl was Rose’s as well, even now, but she still wasn’t ready to regard herself as something good, not when she had held such a nasty grudge against someone so innocent for so long.)  
Her head ducked back downwards to Steven, and she smiled yet again at the sleeping baby, thinking she could stand there all night and not tire of seeing how peaceful he looked. Her hand reached down, gently touching his soft curls, tears running down her cheeks as she spoke in a whisper; “You’re wonderful.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry this is so short! It's my first time writing for these characters, and it's around 5 in the morning currently, so I'm sorry if anything's hugely messed up or OOC. I was just in a bad mood and needed to write some angst. Plus PearlRose is slowly becoming one of my favorite ships in Steven Universe, so I figured I'd try writing something for it!


End file.
